I saw a stupid pigeon this morning hopping around frantically trying to remove a long twig that was stuck under its wing. I felt so bad for it, so I walked over, planning to pull the twig out, but it freaked out and flapped away.
As I walked back onto the side walk, I saw several people glaring at me like I was some kind of depraved animal abuser.
I was just going to pull the twig out! Really!!

MAN my sister has a beautiful, beautiful camera. It's half the size of mine, the flash takes muCH less time to charge, I don't have to wait 5 seconds between shots, and it records video clips wiTH audio!
I borrowed it because I need to record some video clips for the ABSA end of semester slide show. Thanks Christine. I'll try to give it back Spring Break.
Although you might have to pry it from my hands after you kill me.

Just when I thought my wave of tests was over, I find out I have 3 more next week, and another project. Plus that stupid BA thing on top of it. DOES IT EVER STOP!?
*sigh*
Dumpling Dishout and Karoake Night with ABSA tomorrow!

-----BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE-----

To All U.T. Students,

There have been reports of falling ice around the U.T. campus.
Please make sure that when you are going in and out of buildings, or
walking near lines and buildings, that you watch for falling ice. Be
very careful because the falling ice poses a hazard.

I dutifully showed up to mythology class 11 am this morning.
Right before I left, I had a conversation with the devil incarnate (joe) who tried to persuade me to skip and I aLmost didn't go, but good triumphed over evil this time and I went to class.
I sat there for 15 minutes before the TA showed up and said class was canceled. bah. Go me.
So I walked to my biopsychology class 30 minutes early (I was determined to learn today) and sat in some kinda of advanced Calculus class. The professor had white hair and wore a navy suit. It seemed like he talked about nothing for a very long time.

As I headed back, I noticed the walkways to the engineering buiding was COVEred in ice; at least an inch thick. They had 8 guys with shovels out there breaking it up to make paths for people. Everywhere I looked was white. It was so pretty!
Until I almost fell, slammed my skull against the glazed pavement and killed myself...
I recovered, and the pretty whiteness of winter around me had made my good mood kick back, so I forgot my brush with death, and I was pleasantly amused at the UT clock tower's playing of "Let it Snow, Let it Snow, Let it Snow." I smiled and hummed as I walked along.
I walked by a building and heard what sounded like a shot firing overhead. As I looked up, a torrent of ice at least 2 inches thick showered 2 feet in front of me.
O. MY. GOD. I thought I was going to die. again.
I walked faster and heard the *cracK* again. A cascade of ice chunks landed behind me. I yelped and ran down the stairs.
*CraCK*
The icy fingers of death would NOT STOP trying to KILL ME. THis HAPPened 4 times.
All the while "Walking in a Winter Wonderland" is playing on the clock tower.
I glared at the tower. I glared at the roof suspiciously, watching for more ice as I edged away. I glared at all the slush and ice and 'snow' around me.
BAH, HUMBUG.
I ran back to Dobie and decided I have had enOUGH of winter.
I can not wait until Spring.

Christy: From now on, I'm going to call you Ernie.
Me: Ernie??
Christy: You know, like Bert and Ernie.
Me: NO. You be Ernie. I want to be Bert.
Christy: Wait, who was the one that frowned all the time and who was the one who ate cookies?
Me: Bert, frowny. Ernie, cookies.
Christy: Oh. ok. You're Bert and I'm Ernie.
Me: ERnie!
Christy: Berrt!
Me: Errnie!
Christy: Bert~!
Me: [goes back to typing]
Christy: I remember they used to take showers together.
Me: Why, of all things, do you remember thAT?

It felt like a Saturday; I woke up around 10:30, read for a few hours, Christy came back and went to sleep, and I had nowhere to go and nothing to do, so I took a two hour nap. It felt soo good. I was wrapped up all cacoon-like (you tuck every bit of blanket under you) and my 350 count sheets were so soft. sigh... It was wonderful.
Then we went out and watched people slide down hills. It was fun. And sOO cold. There were little doggies (sO cute!) in sweaters and stuff, all shivering, I felt so bad for them. I had on 2 layers of sweatpants, a tank top and sweater (if you tuck the innermost shirt in, it makes you really warm), jacket, longsleeved shirt, christy's thickest jacket, scarf, leather gloves, and I was still cold. CraZy.
Then I had hot chocolate, (it's weird, when your hand warms up after a long time in severe cold, it expands and feels like a million needles are pricking you) and we sat around and ordered wings to eat and watched a cheesy cheesy movie that was so predictable. So we just made fun of it. But overall, it was sucH a relaxing and wonderful day.
You enjoy things the most when you know you should be doing something else. Saturdays aren't nearly as fun.
THeN, just as we were dreading returning to school tomorrow, (I'd have to wake up at 8) the most wonderful thing occured. NO SCHOOL until 11 am tomorrow!
YEee hAH!
At this moment I love my life.

"Because severe weather conditions are expected to continue, The University of Texas at Austin is closed today, Tuesday, Feb. 25. All night work crews have been canceled."

I got 6 IMs this morning telling me there was no school. Everyone's profile says "no school. back to sleep"
I went to the website, and sure enough, all classes canceled.
wa hOO!

According to the weather channel, it's 28 degrees right now, with a NoRth wind at 14 mph, so it feels like 17 degrees!
17 degrees! And we were outside.
Craziness...

Putrid Rat (1:02:55 AM): i hear there was snow playing
Demona848 (1:02:58 AM): yes there was
Putrid Rat (1:03:07 AM): this is one insanely jealous person sitting here...

I'm sitting at my computer (surprise, surprise) clicking apathetically when Jon come up to borrow my camera battery... somehow I end up going outside in the 20 degree weather with Jon, Rebecca, Omar, Ansar, TC and Jenny(?) to take pictures... I didn't understand until I went outside.
IT WAS WHITE! We all oohed and aahed and went outside.
There were so many different types of 'snow'. There was crystal-y snow. There was icy sleet. There was more powdery stuff, but rarely. I liked the ones that went 'crunch crunch crunch' under my feet and were in bigger chunks so I could stomp on them and hear a satisfying chomp.
There were people sliding down the streets (the main street was blocked off) in laundry baskets, trash can tops, chaiRs.. basically anything these young ruffians could get their hands on. People even took those yellow "Caution: Wet Floor" signs from god knows where and slid down 'hills'.
It's amazing how crazy people can get over a little sleet/snow. What can I say. Young people are just bonkers.
People made a longhorn out of snow on the ground, and a horizontal snowman (not enough to have one stand up). As we walked around and my fingers gradually lost all feeling, I noticed every incline on campus was basically occupied with hordes of whooping (supposedly) mature college men and women pushing each other down on sled like contraptions of every kind. We are all kids underneath. All along the way, everyone else except me and maybe Jon threw snowballs at each other and ran and slid through the ice. I don't know why I never do anything like that. I don't think I've ever really just let go. When I do, it will be a momentous event.
We went up the to Jester garage, and ooohed again over the untouched purity of the 'snow.' After a few hours of stomping, sliding, throwing snowballs, snapping pictures, and freezing our buTts off, we headed back.
On the way, it started precipitating freEzing rain. And it is called freezing rain for a reason. It actually stung my face and I yelped and ran and flailed my arms the whole way back. Thanks for lending me your beanie, Jon. Although I still say we all wil die of pneumonia (I spelled it right on my first try!) tomorrow.
Ahhh.. I just took a shower and am warm once again. Time to go back downstairs to Dobie 210 where it is alwAys full of spontaneous fun.

When I stepped outside to go to IM basketball practice, it was SNOWING. well, sleeting. The sides of the roads were white and everything.
Then I took my first step down the stairs of Dobie and almost killed myself. It was coVered in ice.
I went upstairs to tell Christy and we got in warmer clothes to go outside to see, laughing hysterically like little girls over the first 'snow' fall. We stood in the partition between the lobby and outside, and oohed and aahed at the miniscule 'flakes' of sleeT. Then we laughed at how pathetic we must've looked; stupid Texans who've never seen snow.
Then I went back upstairs and put on MOre clothing. I could barely move, so Christy dressed me. I am in dire need of winter clothes; I wore her jacket and thicker scarf.
On the way out, instead of walking down the stairs outside, I decided to use the elevator. It was a good idea.
On the way, I saw this old man on a cane and I felt so bad. He was walking so slowly. I offered my arm and he looked embarassed and said he was fine but thanked me.
I hate that. I hate watching old people trying to do things themselves, and I felt bad so I just kinda followed really close. I think when I'm old I will be the exact same way; I will never admit that I need help. For some reason old people make me sad.

It took me 20 minutes to walk to the Rec center. It was SO slippery; I almost killed myself again going downhill. I wanted to stay home, but I can't miss an ABSA event because of a little sleet! That would be crazyness.
Now I have to decided whether I want to go out and study at the lab or not.
Lab vs. Stay home shower eat cookies sleep early?

sunflower3826 (5:12:24 PM): Get Happy

Pack up your troubles and just get happy
Ya better chase all your cares away
Sing Hallelujah, come on get happy
Get ready for the judgement day

The sun is shining, come on get happy
The Lord is waiting to take your hand
Shout Hallelujah, come on get happy
We're going to the Promised Land

We're heading 'cross the river
Gonna wash our sins in the tide
It's all so peaceful
On the other side

....
That's jessica's song.

Demona848 (5:13:30 PM): http://www.foodrevolution.org/iraq.htm
Demona848 (5:13:32 PM): here's my song
sunflower3826 (5:13:58 PM): ok
Demona848 (5:14:49 PM): like it?

Chris Ha is a bastard.
Read his Feb 06 blog. The loSER spent all that time writing some pathetic trouble shooting guide about me?
Press Cntrl F. Count the number of times Stephanie appears in his blog. DO YOU NOT HAVE A LIFE?
But that's ok. Chris invites me to do stuff, so I know he doesn't totally mean it. And when he does, he has no ulterior motive.
So be thankful, Chris, you have been permitted to live on the condition you eradicate the blemish you have placed upon my name.
NOW.

David Powell is an a**hole. Read his Feb 21 blog.
"It was the kind of cold one would only expect to run into in the most inhuman and inhospitable environments, like in the depths of Stephanie Chen's soul."

I'm only verbally abusive to whiny, witless, immature, irresponsible and ungrateful imbeciles like you. "Wah. I missed class again. What did the teacher say? What was the project about? huh? what's going on? can I use youR access code you paid 25 bucks for and then grudgingly thank you? will you go over the instructions? Want to study for the test together? (even though I hate you most of the time) I think it will be mutually beneficial." Mutually beneficial hOW, you selfish prick?
You say that fake crap when you need me, then write about me in your pathetic little blog about your pathetic little life and use my full name and call me a cold hearted b****?
Die, cretin.
You don't even remOtely know me. How much of my life and time have I really wasted with you? Hardly any. So don't blame me because your stupidity brings out the worst in me.
Why should I take youR crap and have to put up with being called 'evil' when I retaliate? Girls who argue back and don't put up with crap are always 'b*tches'.

"demona - Prolific blogger. Very interesting to read; right now she, Chris, and David are in a tizzy: Chris facetiously calls her evil; David sincerely thinks the same; she uses her blog as a tower from which she rains upon them with arrows of acid fury, eating through their typed-up defenses and leaving scars, deep scars to deter them from making the same mistake twice. "
Nice way to sum it up, keith.

My Nutrition teacher. so weird.
She was short on tests last Friday, and about 80 people had to wait about 15 minutes while she printed more. While that does kinda suck, honestly, it took about 30 minutes to do the test, max. You either know it, or you don't.
But she was so apologetic and afterwards she e-mailed everyone explaining and saying she learned a lesson and will count the tests herself next time.. I thought, "ok.. it's not that big a deal."
Then today, she tells us she kept feeling bad and curved the test up 4 pointes for eVeryone, and will be rewriting the whole test and giving a retake for anYone to take the Friday before Spring Break. Same material, and she takes the highest of both scores.
Wa-hoo.
I had been studying for eco most of the week, so I studied for the last Nutrition test maybe 3 hours, including my daydreaming every 10 minutes. I did ok, but now I can take it again! I still can't believe she's so nice about it though.. but she said she wanted to be fair. Heck, if I was a professor, I'd knoW the test didn't take more than an hour and just go, "Sorry. It won't happen again." I thought the curve was enough.
But hey, who am I to complain, right? I hope I do lots better. This is a great opportunity.

BAH. It's 36 degrees. High of 40 for the next 2 days. rainy. cloudy. rainy. cloudy.
poO!
It was so beautiful all weekend, too..

I can't believe the weekend is over.
It didn't feel like a weekend at all. We just went from one ABSA activity to another.
I reallY did not want to get up this morning. I hate how my 9 o'clock class takes attendence; it's the only class that does.
At the Leadership Conference on Saturday one of the speakers was the woman who argued and won the Roe vs. Wade case. She was 27 at the time. That is incredibly young. Just by listening to her talk you could tell she was an intelligent person and had superB analytical skills. She was one hell of a speaker. Sarah Weddington said that in the 70's she was applying for a credit card, and the guy at the bank told her she had to get her husband's signature; her own credit wasn't enough. She told him that shE was the lawyer in the family and was actually putting her husband through law school. But he dismissed her anyways.
So she said she just had to go to the legislature and pass the Equal Credit Opportunity Law (1975) and go back and get her credit card.
I was in awe.
It seemed like everything she wanted to get done, she did. Everything that stood in her way, she knocked down. She piloted Air Force One!
I'm sure she made many mistakes, and yadda yadda, but still...
I learned this weekend there is still so much I have left to learn and do.

I have my own webspace now (thanks Jon) and now I can post the quizzes that have you copy and paste the link to their image but then doesn't work by putting the images onto my owN site and then linking it from there to my blog.
yay.

I'm a Fire Spirit
What's YOUR Writing Style?


Which 'Oh My Goddess!' Deity are You?




What LOTR Male & Mood Do You Desire?
*sigh*



I fancy Elves.
The only one that will ever look good in tights. Oh yea.
Which culture from Middle-Earth do you fancy?





(competitive)(critical)(particular)
Friends Quiz

Flkweoriulgsdf.
ABSA all weekend.. I am tired.
Friday: slept at 4am. wake up at 8 am. Test. sleep. wake up at 3 pm. Mixer with ABSA and ASAAP (older ABSA basically) and bowled with our mentors. Ate at Katz's. Slept at 3.
Saturday: wake up at 8. leadership conference till 3. laser tag with absa. dinner. get home now.
tomorrow: dim sum (absa - with our big brother/big sister) at 12, then movie with our group. then stupiD BA meeting.
blah. So tired.
Should I do laundry now?
I guess. no time tomorrow.

FREE AT LAST! FREE AT LAST!! THANK GOD ALMIGHTY, I AM FREE AT LAST!!!

i go sleep now.
ZzzzZzzzzzzz........

It is 1am and I have not started studying for my test at 9 am tomorrow. Why?
1) I've been worrying about Eco all week, which makes me mad because I knew a loT more that what we were tested over! I hope I get a good grade...
2) Got back from ABSA around 8 something
3) Ate
4) Relaxed for an hour to maintain sanity
5) Replied e-mails, wrote ABSA Informer article (why not do it earlier, you ask? refer to #1 and add 4 tests, 4 quizzes and 1 project in the past few weeks) which actually took awhile.
6) Uploaded, went through ABSA pictures (about 1/3 are usually deleted) edited and organized them to send to the editors.
7) I am going to take a shower and
8) Read until 4 am. I've heard sleeping in four hour clocks is ideal. So I guess if 8 is impossible, I'll deal with 4.

poo on me.

OMG CHRISTY SAW THE ALBINO SQUIRREL!!!
I wanna see the squirrel!

I despise tests. I really do.
I especially dislike it when you study ALL this stuff, and only 20% of it is on the test. I really really hate that.
Sigh.
One more tomorrow plus a quiz and it's over I guess.
I take it back. waiting for it to be over isn't enough.. It's even more excruciating wondering how you did.
(big) *Sigh*

If I was a cartoon, my eyeballs would be bulGING with red veins right now.
over a DOZen times (I am not exaggerating) these inconsiderate cretins inthe room right below me have blasted their damn music well past midnight.
On the weekends, I tolerate it (not without the occasional muffled cussing and banging on our floor).
I have a test tomorrow I have studied my butt off for, a test the next morning at 9, then a biopsych quiz at 1 (the class avg of the last one was mayb 50).
SO I DO NOT appreciate their loudness.
I do not care if I'm being selfish. I just don't think music needs to be blasted loud enough for the floor above you to hear it.
I have left 2 notes on their door, Christy, 1.
We've knocked on their door 3 times and called security once (3 am is just ridiculous)
DIE. die die die.
ONe of these days I sweAR I will cuss those hoes out.
*simmering*
grr.
G'night.

You know what makes me sick?

"In his State of the Union address of 29 January 2002, President Bush asserted that 'America will always stand firm for the non-negotiable demands of human dignity'. Among these non-negotiable issues, the President listed 'equal justice'.
Two months earlier, on 13 November 2001, he had signed a Military Order on the Detention, Treatment and Trial of Certain Non-Citizens in the War Against Terrorism (''Military Order''). Its provisions are applicable only to foreign nationals. Any person placed under the Military Order would be denied fair trial rights that the US authorities would recognize for similarly placed US citizens, in violation of international law guaranteeing equality before the law and prohibiting discrimination, including on the basis of nationality."

"The Bush administration launched a massive campaign of preventive detention, based on little evidence of wrongdoing. The INS jailed hundreds of people, without even alleging involvement in Al Qaeda or 9/11.The sweep proceeded under an unprecedented veil of secrecy and under a presumption of guilty until proven innocent" (Cole)

I can't believe that 66% of Americans are "willing to surrender civil liberties to stop terrorism." (ABC-Washington Post survey)

IDIOTS. By giving up our rights to privacy, we are in sense giving up what it means to be American. 4th amendment, you fools.
These igorant paranoid freaks may feel that jailing hundreds of people that looK suspicious makes them feel safe for the time being, but why don't these patriotic flag toting morons think about the long-run and what it really means to give government the right to invade our privacy?
Don't wave around a flag and then damn everything it stands for by persecuting innocents and blindly allowing the government to take away your rights.
I can't wait until the next election.
And if the Bush Administration makes abortion illegal and takes away a woman's freedom of choice I might just have to shoot him before he runs again.

A pretty little bluejay hopped right onto a branch in front me as I was walking today.
As he cocked his head and nearby mockingbirds chirped and I noticed what looked like purple Mountain Laurel blooming near the buildings, I smiled to myself and was so happy it was almost Spring.

THEN I noticed that warmer weather also brought out the damn cigarette smokers.

I guess winter made their tar stained fingers too cold to clutch the disgusting things, and now that the weather is so nice, they can RUIN it for everyone within a 6 foot radius by blowing streams of NASTY SMOKE in our faces.
Many times I see others, along with myself, having to scurry in front of these people to prevent that crap from going into our lungs, only to see another future lung cancer patient a few feet ahead.

Yes. I hate the smell of cigarette smoke. If I know you, please don't ever let on you smoke. I mean, wHY would you purposely stain your teeth, deteriorate your lungs, speed up your heart rate, and perfume yourself in that gaGGINg stench? I really don't understand at all.
On the way to nutrition and back from biopsychology (both of which make me a lot more health conscious) I saw at least 7 people within a few minutes sucking on a cigarette. YecH.

Oh, and on another note, I also heard several people pass by me speaking in Chinese with a Beijing accent and it was so cool and made me miss hearing Chinese so much. I think that, if anything, made me kind of glad I'm going to Beijing to study Chinese this summer. I haven't really looked forward to it at all until now, and I realize I can't wait to learn to speak like that! neat-O.

Also, when I was walking into Burdine hall, I noticed something familiar about the particular smell of the classrooms, and then I realized it triggered memories of my first years at CYC. It smelled like the classrooms we had calligraphy and crafts classes in, and I started to feel nostalgic. I'm sad I can't go this year.. it'll be the first time I missed it in 10 years. Sigh.

SOo, I guess the whole point of this was how amazing it is how smells (smoke, classrooms), sights (purple flowers) and sounds (birds, accents) can make you feel so many different things all at once. The brain is so amazing!

I think biopsych class is getting to me. People tell me I'm idiotic for taking classes like nutrition and biopsychology, but I really don't regret it. I really love tying what I learn from different classes together. Like in nutrition today when we were talking about proteins and she listed some, I recognized Tryptophan and I said aloud "hey! Tryptophan is a precursor for Dopamine!" People looked at me funny and I sheepishly began taking notes again.
Ok. time to study now. big exam tomorrow.

lazybum234: sigh, the rockets lost.
Demona848: 2 overtimes, huh?
Demona848: so i heard.
lazybum234: yeah.
Demona848: stupie rockets
Demona848: blaH
lazybum234: i love them.
Demona848: I know.
Demona848: it's a love/hate thing
lazybum234: more like a love/why can't they win thing
lazybum234: i'm so sad.
Demona848: hahaha

jeff you are so funny

I'm tired of going from one class to one meeting to one panel to studying to activity to class to studying.
I've missed Smallville and kickboxing for the past 3 weeks....
3 more days. 2 more tests.
*sigh*

My printer works again. I love it so much I have gone print happy and am printing all these notes for the Eco test.
yay.

We practiced basketball for 2 hours.. I think I learned more in that time than I had in my whole life of playing 5 minutes here and there in a real game. We had more girls this time, and it was really fun. I think girls were a loT more hardcore than the guys; we grappled and fought for the ball a lot and fell.. and got hurt.. a lot. But it was fun.
I want to play again!
2 more tests. blah.
it's almost over. almost over. almost over...

I was so out of it this morning, I put shower gel in my hair. I didn't realize it until my hair started feeling all weird. I screamed "I'm an IDiot!!" to wake myself up and washed it out with shampoo.
But it still feels weird.

Guess where I am.
IN the millenium lab! studying! (mostly)
Who would have thought leaving my room and my computer forces me to do work. I must do this more often.. come to this newly discovered sanctuary of intellectual pursuits. It is amazing.
I am bored as heck.
Save me. Please let it be Friday already.
ok. back to more reading.

All work and no play makes stephanie INSANE!!!!
I can not waiT until 10am next Friday.
no more tests no more tests no more tests.
2 down 3 to go. If I get all As I will reward myself.

I like Jon Jon's profile about Project 2003. "we volunteered to plant trees - but instead we cut them down"
While waiting for the bus we made human pyramids. Our record was only 4 levels. Maybe next time. I've got some great pictures though, so it was worth it.
I smell really bad. shower time.

Project 2003. (Habitat for Humanity)
Spent one hour waiting for the bus to take us to the park.
30 minutes eating the free burgers they had for volunteers.
Less than 2 hours clearing brush, sawing down (little) trees for some park beautification thing.
Spent 1 hour waiting for bus to go back.
*cracks knuckles, props feet up on the table, and chugs back a beer*
ahhh..
It's been a long day...

It's Valentines.
big whoop.
Everyone has their away message up and it's only 5 in the afternoon on a Friday that's so greY..

Someone said I updated my blog too often.
You know what I say to that??
nothing. there's nothing I can say. I mean, it's obviously true.

It's incredibly gray and cloudy and drizzly. slight breeze. Humidity is at 100% and there is a 'Sct T-Storms' .. whatever that means. Something Thunderstorms.
There was nothing in the above sentence that you could not have gotten by going to your window and looking outside or checking the weather page. but hey, that's what I'm here for, right?
I think I'm just delaying studying for my test in less than 2 hours.

How Republican Are You?


.... take the quiz. check out all the results. It's hilarious.

I just finished reading mythology!
That doesn't necessarily mean studying... but at least I read it all, right? TWO hundred and 30 pages.
It goes fast though, I like stories a lot.
I also ate a Greek salad Christy brought back, so maybe that helped. hahaha.
Anyways, I'm in a good mood again. So far my eco quizzes have been good, and I just feel like I can actually study enough and be on top of things this semester.
AND I ate chocolate.
And I realized all these people are going bonkers about Valentines day, but then today for some reason I just realized how many great people I know and I feel very loving towards everyone for some reason and that's all that matters!
I can't wait till these tests are over and I can start sEeing people again.

Being able to blast music and just relax makes me really happy.
I like studying for things I don't have to have total silence for (Eco). I'm in a really good mood now.

Christy is taking an evolution class, and one of her readings was about sexual selection and is written by a psychologist professor at UT (so it's more psychology than evolution - but still very interesting) and we both found it VERY amusing.

“Across all cultures, men placed a greater premium than women on only two characteristics – attractiveness and youth, both known cues to a woman’s fertility and reproductive value (Gangestad and Thornhill, 1994, Singh, 1993; Symons, 1995)”

“Women are nearly universal in their expression of a stronger desire for men with good financial prospects, as well as the cues that lead to resources, such as ambition, industriousness, and social status”

“Both equally desired mates who were kind, intelligent, dependable, and healthy”

Men are more likely to be extremely jealous of “sexual infidelity. In contrast, women’s jealousy” is “more heavily focused on a man’s emotional involvement with another woman.” Probably because men face the “uncertainty in paternity.”

And the best one of all:

"In one study, men and women were approached by attractive confederates of the opposite sex and asked to go out on a date that night go back to the confederate’s apartment that night, or have sex with that confederate that night (Clark and Hatfield, 1989).

Of the women approached by the male confederate, 50% agreed to a date, 6% agreed to go back to his apartment, and 0% agreed to have sex.
Of the men approached by female confederates, 50% agreed to the date, 69% agreed to go back to her apartment, and 75% agreed to have sex.”
Several studies of the same nature was done and yielded very similar results.

hahaha.

Demona848: daMN
Demona848: 75?
Demona848: #$*@#%#%
jeff: it's in a vase
jeff: dozen roses
jeff: u obviously haven't bought a dozen roses for a girl before
jeff: :-)
Demona848: nope..
Demona848: holy crap
jeff: hehe
jeff: it's not so bad
jeff: can u put a price on love?
Demona848: awW!

As I was sleepily walking to my biopsychology class, I heard a distant chanting of voices and beating of drums.
There's something primitive about it, the sychronized shouting and banging... it just jolts something inside of you awake. I immediately perked up and cocked my head in the direction of the sound.
The waving flags, large flourescent sheets of posterboard, loud angry voices and rapping of bongos were all in protest of War in Iraq.
I capitilize it because I feel these days, it's become its own entity.
"I am against War in Iraq" "I support War in Iraq" "I hate War in Iraq"
As I continued to class, I stared in wonder at these people who felt so strongly about something that they had gathered in this mob to display it.

I also passed a stagnant group of people holding up hastily scrawled signs on notebook paper saying "Go Bush" and "Hurray for W". What these inert people were half-heartedly trying to take a stand for I have no idea. Were they for war? Because I didn't see any "Go War in Iraq" signs. They were simply cheering for Bush. Were they assuming Bush is synonymous with war? Either way, three things threw me off -
1) the lack of clarity in what the heck they were rooting for 2) their lack of zeal in that stance .. and 3) while the first group had such diversity, these "go dubya" people were one tenth the size of their size and ... way too similar in race and dress to possibly represent the variety of ideas on campus. (Am I biased or what)

Protests and demonstrations have always been a part of American culture, and while I was born here and am pretty opinionated and out-spoken myself, I still embody enough of the Chinese reserve and decorum to keep from chanting and marching and go to class. (because skipping class is very bad, you know)

So we got our test grades back and class was dismissed.

On the way back, the parade of protestors had migrated to the Main Building, right in front of the clock tower. Impulse and curiousity led me to wander over and pull out pen and paper. I jotted down everything I saw and heard.
The signs: "No War" "Who are the Real Terrorists?" "WWJD in Iraq? NOT kill the people" "Drop Bush, not bombs" (a personal favorite)

Everyone took turns at the microphone - the first of whom I saw was a woman who had just gotten back form Iraq. She had worked with the hospitals and stated how scared the Iraqi people were and how "the Iraqi people and Saddam Hussein are noT the same person"
She talked about her brother serving in Vietnam, and how Bush had never seen the horrors of war, or gone over and seen how 50% of Iraq's population is children (48.5% under the age of 18) and seen babies lying in the alley ways. She talked about the bombs wiping out electricity, water (which was already so scarce and hard to obtain) and the people having no where to run. When she left to return to America, they begged her not the leave; they believed the Americans won't bomb them if they had their own citizens there. Unemployment rate was 60%, they had 1 ambulence per 30,000 people and one doctor for each 10,000.

Remember in Forest Gump, the scene with all the hippies protesting in front of the Capitol, with the Washington Monument rising up behind them? While this wasn't nearly as awe inspiring, I realized this was as close as I would ever get to watching a group of fervent 'young people' speak out against war. It's a pretty weird feeling.
Then this guy went up and spoke about UT's upcoming budget cut, and led a chant of "Money for Schools, Not for War."
He then talked about how the war plan, and if enacted, would drop 300-400 cruise missles within the first 24 hours - more than in the 40 days of the Gulf War combined. And that's just the first day. They planned on another 300 missles for the next day. He quoted a general who claimed they wanted a quick attack, much like the "bombing at Hiroshima". You know, because the faster we get rid of these people the better. Makes sense. Who wants to waste time on a long war, right?
He spoke how each of this million dollar missles could go to fund education and how ironic it is we want to rid Saddam Hussein of weapons of mass destruction, when we're using them ourselves (I think any weapon that kills so many = weapons of mass destruction, be it nuclear, chemical or biological) to prove a point.

One woman adressed us as fellow "tree-huggers, bra-burners, peace-lovers, INtellectuals" and was obviously a very blatant democrat because she told the people to hug the person next to them and asked if we thought "this shit goes on at Republican parties"
Then she said that the "Bible that those conservatives are all so damn crazy about" says we should feed and help the hungry and needy instead of killing them. She denounced the "gray faced men hiding behind boardrooms manufaturing her consent" and promoted peace and said how it's a good thing we don't need our "rich alumni uncles to get us into the pearly gates," which I found pretty amusing.

People talked about Bush and his conservative administration taking away our choice of abortion, affirmative action, civil rights, education funds, etc etc.
The last guy I heard started talking about how when he was our age during the Vietnam war... and as I walked away, I noticed the inscription on the main building "Ye shall know the truth and the truth shall make you free."

Let's hope so.

Round two of attempted toothbrushing successful!

Me: I'm going to sleep now.
Christy: *picks up things to leave*
Me: Where are you going??
Christy: Outside. (living room) I have to read. I've been reading like a snail.
Me: And snails don't read! So it's just like you! hahaha.. snails don't read.. haha..ha...
Christy: *throws nickel at my head*
Me: HA! You misseD!
Christy: *attempts to fire again*
Me: *collects coins for artillery* This is war! WAR!
Christy: Whaat is it good for?
Me: Ugh.. *dives under blankets*

Me: AHHH! Look what I did! I was putting toothpaste on my toothbrush, but when I swung it up to my mouth, it got on my shirt!
Christy: That seems like something I would do.... you pulled a Christy!
Me: *poking at blob on sleeve* It's a good thing I have sOO many big t-shirts!
Christy: Where do you get those anyways?
Me: Free. ABSA/Business school events.
Christy: Give me one!
Me: No. Why should I? I don't even like you!
Christy: Because I am your roomate! .... and if you don't, I'll burn you wardrobe!
Me: Like you haven't said thAT before! You're like a mobster! "Give me payments for protection... .against mE!"
Christy: I'm glad we understand each other.
Me: *starts brushing teeth*
Christy: *returns to studying*

Christy went to HEB today.
The first time we've had bread.
I figure, I can finally use that tub of peanut butter in the cupboard. I go to get it, and it's EIGHT tenTHS gone!
Christy doesn't eat peanut butter, and I know our suitemates sometimes uses our stuff, but EIGHT tenTHS of my peanut butter??
*crunching on peanuts inside sandwich bitterly*
blAh on them.
crunch crunch.

Just when I think it can't get any worse, they come out with a show called "Are You Hot?"
STUPID.
It's like a competition between TV stations to see just how shallow they can get and stilLL have millions of stupid viewers.

I am grumbly in my tummy.
And when I'm grumbly, I'm grumpy.

YAY almost done with eco power point.
Just one more test in Mythology on Friday (= 200+ pages of reading) and I'm fREee.... for awhile at least. There's a fencing test Monday, but that shouldn't be too hard.

It is official.
I have ran out of food.
It makes me very panicky for some reason.
I could eat junk food anywhere; taco bell & wendy's & wings & pizza.
But the site of it just makes me sick. I can't eaT that stuff. I just can't.
I need fruit and rice and milk and even instant mac and cheese.
I really want an apple.
I NEED A CAR!
*sniff*
I'm hungry...

I dreamT about the parts of brain last night.
It just kept repeating over and over. Cerebellum. Caudate nucleus. Pons. Tegmentum.
My first test is over. yay. I will be in a state of constant anxiety till I get it back.
On the way back from class, I passed by some guy I had met somewhere awhile ago, and I said hi and he looked at me like he couldn't quite place where I was from.
I thought 'must be something wrong with his hippocampus.' Hahaha. heh... um.. you know? consolidation of memory..?
Anyways, I thought it was funny.

Spent all of yesterday making baskets for absa at sarah's and playing cranium (which is a really good game - I want to buy it now).
There are up to 4 teams and 4 categories. It's like a combination of guesstures/charades, pictionary and trivial pursuit with a twist. For example, for the artsy category, instead of just drawing, there is also sensosketch where you draw with your eyes closed as your team mates guess, or sculting with playdo, etc. There's acting out things then there's acting like famous people or humming a song (which is surprisingly hard as we didn't know half the songs). Sometimes there is club cranium where very team gets to compete to get the right answer first; those are really fun. You also need lots of people, we had about 12 yesterday, and I thought that was a good number.
I did bring my biopsych notebook and read it throughout the day out of guilt; I actually learned a lot of stuff.
I think I get more done in little chunks than sitting down for 5 hours and making myself learn, because then I only end up really studying for 1 or 2. But when I'm out, I feel guilty for not studying, so whenever I get a chance and I do study, even for 30 minutes, I learn a lot more. Plus I always learn better talking about it or having someone quiz me (which is rare because who the heck wants to study if they don't have to?)
IM basketball was really good today. There was this one girl who must've scored 2/3 of the 57 points they ended up with. She was incredible; just one lay up (layup/lay-up?) after another. But we actually only lost by 2 points, which has to be a record for absa IM sports. hahaha. o well. next time.
I am adding to my collection of bruises; for some reason I seem to fall at least once every game on my right knee. Then one of the girls and I banged our foreheads and I saw splotches of pretty color for awhile.
It is such a beautiful day today; I hate to be stuck inside studying. Why is it I can study better with people around? I need to learn to be productive alone.

yeah. so casino night wasn't as great as I imagined.
It was fun dressing up and seeing everyone and all, but I guess my imaginings are aLways a lot more.. out there than things turn out to be.
I had figured it to be more like vegas, but it was more pro-grad than anything, and a hECK of a lot more crowded.
It sucked - once you left your spot in a blackjack table you probably wouldn't get able to get back in the rest of the night. The rooms were too small and there shoulda been a loT more tables.
One of the dealers was completely incompetant, she made wrong change, couldn't add the numbers up, couldn't shuffle, didn't deal fast enough, and honestly, for the first half of the game I could see what she had when she 'subtly' looked to see what she had. But I didn't wanna lose my spot so I endured it for awhile.
I learned how to play craps, but someone decided to play the most risky bet ever with most of our money and lost it. And continued to lose it in 2 hands of poker at the last minute. blARGH. hehe. but it's ok. I mean, prizes were raffle tickets that were impossible to win, so it's all good.
bUT! Chris omar JON rebecca michael shuo david and I went to Player's afterwards and the food was surprisingly really good and reasonably priced. I had a bacon cheeseburger and the best chocolate milkshake (I can't remember the last time I had one). yuM. We had lots of fun. I think I enjoyed that part of the night the best, just eating and sitting and talking and laughing.
man. that makes me hungry.
I go eat.

Demona848 (12:59:52 PM): lalala
Demona848 (1:01:51 PM): bunny wabbit
N3mesis85 (1:04:12 PM): *stabs the bunny to a bloody pulp*
Demona848 (1:04:16 PM): EW
Demona848 (1:04:19 PM): freaK!

My biopsychology class lies in the depths of the EJC; it takes 5 doors, 2 winding staircases and several hallways to get to it.
Every day after class, I happen to always leave right after this one guy who opens eVery single one of those doors and will wait for you and keep the door open even if you're a couple steps behind. I always feel bad and have to half run so he doensn't stand there waiting.
Today I quelled an urge to ask, "WHY do you do this? Why?"
I'm curious to know whether people like that just have really good mommys that taught them well, or what? I mean, what goes through their head? "Hey, I'll just be nice and hold the door." or "Chivalry demands that I hold the door."
So I guess the question is: Guys that do hold the door, do you do it because your parents taught you to be polite, or is it an innate sense of courtesy, or what?
Either way, it's nice to have people like that.

Demona848: i need atTentioN..
David: you need vAliuM..;-)

running laps in my room
huddled in bed in fetal position
humming a tuneless song
lalalallalallalalala....
I AM IN DIRE NEED OF HUMAN INTERACTION!!!

I just went outside and skipped around the hallways in many many circles.
I really think I am losing it.

For some reason I am getting more and more hyper.
I think staying inside and doing boring stuff like studying and researching makes me build up all this pent up enegy. I feel like I haven't been around people in SO long.
When I was going to Eco today, I was actually sinGing (Chicago - what else) in the hall of my dorm and I didn't realize there were 4 people waiting for the elevators. 3 of them were asian guys that I recognized but didn't know the names of. Again. I assured them I was not crazy. Then I just kept talking and babbling, so Im not sure they believed me. O well.
This is what happens when I'm in a confined area for too long. Then in Eco he just kept talking and I was SO antsy and annoyed. He is the worst teacher ever.
So I was really glad to get out and go to an ABSA meeting. And before that Peter was looking over the power point and Jeff stopped by and I was like TWO people to talk to! (That hasn't happened in a long time - lately I just see roommate and suitemates)
The meeting had so many people and I had fun babbling more the entire time.
I realized I am nOT a good alone time person. I love being by myself and just relaxing or just walking around when the weather's nice or reading, but I reaLLy could not ever live my life by myself.
I am SO excited about Casino Night tomorrow! Dressing up and going with lots and lots of people (that I like) and gambling. Three good things!!
What is wrong with me.
I hate being in my dorm by myself. Should I study tonight?
OH! And no nutrition class tomorrow!! YAY. So no waking up before 8. I can sleep till 10.
I think I'll go downstairs. I am going crazy.

I have been doing this power point thing for 5 hours.
FIVE HOURS! #*$&)$%*#(5
OK. what makes some people think copying and pasting articles constitutes as RESEARCH!
HOW are you helping me if I have to read and extract pertinent info?? YOU did not contribute at aLL!
DIE DIE DIE
Anyways. so yeah.
I have a quiz in 20 minutes and I still look like a hobo (you have to see my clothes to understand).
I'm blasting Chicago now.
AHHH
And all that jAzz.

Christy: You look like a Marie..
Me: What?
Christy: I don't know.. for some reason you just seem like you would have a French name.
Me: [pauses to think] Fine. You look.. German. Or Russian. Natasha! From now on you are Natasha.
Christy: Or maybe you should be Patricia. Katrina.
(why are these all prissy names, by the way?)
Me: Fine. Then you're Gertrude.
Christy: You know what the ugliest name is? Olga.
Me: whatever, Bernice.

0498: all i have are miniature snickers bars
Demona848: yuck
Demona848: I only consume boxed chocolates
Demona848: none of those individually wrapped chocolates for commoners
0498: wow stephanie
0498: if you were a guy, i think i might have to punch you in the face once in a while
0498: but that's ok, you've been kicked in the face (just joking)
Demona848: I'm going to blog you. then post your address and offer a reward for your death

The Substantial Nigra (a little black part of the tegmentum which is part of the mesencephalon aka midbrain) sends neurotransmitters to the Caudate Nucleus and the Putamen (both parts of the Basal Ganglia {part of the Telencephalon aka forebrain}).
The Basal Ganglia deals with movement. Thus, when the nuerons in the Substantial Nigra are effected by toxins (that cause MPTP to be converted to MPP+ by MAO and go into the mitochondria and kill off dopamine in the Substantial Nigra) they cease to be sent to the Basal Ganglia and Parkinson's (weakness, tremors, rigidity of limbs, poor balance) develops.

I have been sitting at my desk for almost 5 hours.
I'M STARTING TO GO INSANE!

blub blub blub blub blub blub blub lbulb lublublublb.

Everytime the room next door takes a shower, the water backs up into ouR tub and fills it with water and leaves a yuckY residue of gray craP in out tub.
Gross gross gross gross groSS!

I have been stuck in my dorm for what feels like forEVER!
(&%#$)*#&@(*#)$@&#%)@_$#(&%@)#
I can noT wait until my first few tests are over and I (hopefully) have solid grades in those classes so I can
stOP
freAKing
ouT.

yesterday during kickboxing I was kicked across the face. My new partner had a loT longer legs then I expected so I didn't hold the pads up high enough.
and beliEve me.. you have noT seen stars until you've been kicked in the face.
I have a slight bruise and it hurts when I touch it, but I'm just relieved it's not too visible.
My high pain threshold stems from my vanity.

I'm so tired.
BUt I've been studying more!
And I've been a good girl! really.
less spending. more exercising. more studying.
It's good I guess... I do enjoy the getting in shape and ABSA and I really like what I'm learning but it just feels like work work work.
I'm tired and sore a lot but being constantly busy makes me productive.. unlike last semester.
But the thing is.. I don't see anyone anymore!
I remember last semester I just hung out with people all the time (albeit I also did not so hot grade-wise) and I realized that lately I don't even really talk online to them and I wonder what people think about that. I MISS everyone. When these two weeks are over I will budget my time sO well and do stuff again.
I thrive on social interaction. Okk, so that's an exaggeration, but I still..
I can't wait till I can DO stuff again!

O my gosh just when I think I can noT get anymore sore, I do.
I AM SORER THAN EVERER!
I tentatively asked Shanna if she thought I should go to kickboxing today if I could barely walk up the stairs, and she yelled "YES. GO!"
I was So frightened that I went. hahaha. But I don't regret it.
Although I marvel at the fact that even typing makes my forearm tendons or whatever HURT like a .. #$&%$(#&*@$@$.
And don't even get me started on my gluteus maximus.

Putrid Rat (1:20:07 AM): again...no one gives gimli any love man...
Putrid Rat (1:20:11 AM): what the hell is up with that...

Who is your Ideal Lord of the Rings (male) Mate?


hahahaha. yAY.
Aragorn isn't bad either...


I would like both.
you know, to meet my Alpha and Beta requirements...

I finished reading mythology!
I can noT stop playing the Chicago soundtrack.
Over and over and over.
Someone go see it with me again sometime, k?
Or buy me the soundtrack.
I realLY like it.
hahaha. and my suitemates (Melanie especially) has been playing it noN stop for a week also, I just realized.
Christy: Everywhere I go I hear Chicago !
She's in the living room reading, and surrounded on both sides by the soundtrack. But I have earphones on now. It's hard not to sing. I think when I have my own room I will be singing a lot. Hopefully the walls will be thick.

i'm too pooped to blog.
the next two weeks will reaLLy suck.
Chocolates sent to Dobie room 911 are much appreciated!
you know, to keep up my energy and stuff.

GRR.. so many meetings and things and readings and stuff....
I GO CRAZY..
AnD I have been in a state of constant soreness since the beginning of the semester.
Fencing gets surprisingly tiring (those costumes are SO stuffy) and with people making me go to the gym and IM basketball and kickboxing starting, I'm exercising more this semester than I have my entire life.
Yes, I lived a very sedentary life. (oooh.. Health vocabulary)
What I would like at the moment is a long bath and then a full body massage.
Anyone up for the job?
hahaha. juST kidding!
I really am sore though..

I woke up real sleepy (big surprise) and found that playing songs wake me up.
From the Chicago soundtrack: Cell Block Tango
hahaha. listen to it.
Ugh..
Its going to be a long day..

Christy: [in high pitched childish voice] Stephanie... tell me a stoRy..
Me: [in motherly, sing songy voice] Once upon a time, there was a little girl named Christy.
Christy: [in a flat, monotone voice] And then she killed herself.
Me: [in regular, disgusted voice] I guess we just wrote a short story...
Christy: *maniacal laugh* hee hee hee...

I hate groupwork.
BA 102 is like high school all over again.
You volunteer to write up an assignment oncE and before you know it the next time it needs revision and more work the group automatically assumes yoU will do it again.
Why the heck should I be the one to do everything and make copies for everyone again? I don't understand how some people don't feel guilty for not doing their part. How can you just let someone else do all the work? I e-mailed everyone the original and asked them to help. It's been almost a week and my outlook express sends me this "your e-mail has been read" things... so I knoW they saw it..
How are these irresponsible people going to business men & women?
I hATE moochers.
ARGH.

Anyways, I saw Chicago yesterday. I really liked it. It was very different. I guess if you don't like broadway, it's not that great, but I'd actually really want to see it again.
But for now, I have to study.

Our first official ABSA IM basketball game of the season. Once again, we lost to much bigger ... whiter people.
There is a reason you do not see asians in the NBA.
Except for Yao Ming, of course - and that is merely because he is a freak of nature. But don't get me wrong. I like Yao Ming. (duh, I'm Chinese)
Since there weren't enough girls and there had to be 3 out on the court at all times (because boy are ball hogs - I've learned this since middle school) it was tiring as heck.
.. I am so out of shape...
I was thinking about it, and I think my competitiveness has something to do with childhood stuff. Gym for a nerdy (and believe me, I was the epitome of nerdy), skinny Chinese girl was hell, of course. You don't get passed the ball, you don't get picked for any teams.. so when people were laughing at me today for really trying to get the ball ( I reaLLy wanted it )I thought about how ironic that was.
I think it stems from and subconscious desire to overcome a male dominated game in a male dominated society and the ball symbolizes everything that the female gender can just as well handle but could never have.
hahaha. who am I kidding. That may be remOtely true, but I'm just a competitive, psycho little girl who really wanted to foul those big white girls to get the wittle ball.
yay for practice tomorrow.

Our Chinese school had a New Year's festival; it must have had 5 times as many people as it did last year. I was completely taken aback by how many people were there.
Last year the parking lot was a pretty sad sight - it was mostly an expanse of grey cement, a few people meandering from booth to booth, some homemade carnival games, and not much else. This year the parking lot was craMmed - Red paper banners and lanterns hung in multitudes in every booth and everywhere you saw there were people crowding to see the food and wares displayed.
In the background the heavy beating of the lion dance drum and the clang of cymbals made it so festive and so traditional that just taking in the sight made me start to get really excited.
The weather was perfect - a light breeze, clear sky, and we sold so much food and trinkets for fundraising. It was impressive how many people spent their whole Saturday out there volunteering. I am very grateful to my parents for always doing stuff like that for the community so that I could learn to do it too.
There were SO many cute little kids all dressed up in traditional Chinese clothing.. they were so adorable. Then the little girls went on stage to sing and perform their song, hopping and clapping out of sync, but they were so cute it didn't matter.
I also liked how many non asian people were there asking about the different traditions and stuff. There were many Caucasian couples who just adopted a Chinese kid (usually a girl - I dunno why) and I was glad they brought their daughter there to learn about these traditions.
so.. basically it was a very Chinese weekend. Count how many times I said Chinese in the past 2 blogs.

YAy. Last night was fun.
We got back just in time for dinner, and I saw xiuan1 xiuan1 (my little cousin Gloria) and wearing her little red traditional Chinese vest and I said I wished I had one too. Then I remembered I had this little chi2 pao2 (those Chinese dresses) from when I was 3 or something and I figured since I could still wear that thing till I was practically 10, (I was taller, but still skinny) then she could wear it too. (She's 8). She's a lot like me in that she's also really tiny for her age.
So gwai1 bao3 (Angeline) was cajoled into putting the chi2 pao2 on, which was rare because she's kinda.. bratty.. sometimes.
Then I put one on and yelled at Christine to come upstairs so she was made to put on one too. yaY! So much more festive and fun. Plus it makes the adults laugh, so everYone, except Gloria, Angeline and Christine were happy...
Then my mom started snapping pictures and my aunts and uncles started shouting suggestions in Chinese.
*flash* "Close that door!" *flash* "Stand in front of white wall .. Look better!" *flash* *flash* "Smile more!" *flash* "Look this way!" *flash* *flash* *whrrrrrrr* "oh! There goes a roll of film!"

Christine rolls her eyes... "ugh. We are SO Chinese...."
hahahaha. It was fun. I miss my family.

Then a few hours later for some reason we were playing with our cousins in Christine's room and I started asking for her jewelry box. Christine started putting everything she had on, and then we got the idea to dress up like we did for her birthday 10 years ago. So she put on every gold piece of jewelry of hers and mine, and I put on all the silver,black, white and pearl ones. Hers was topped off with a hobo/hippie looking shirt, my beret, and small lensed sunglasses. I wore a black felt cowboy hat with rhinestones and black feathers. (don't ask). We went downstairs..
And another roll of film is used.

have to go now. chinese school has festival.. we are going to volunteer.. it'll be like old days again!